Man Overboard!

A place to hang my shit.

Daddy has “nimples”

Posted on August 10th, 2009 in drama, family, funny, kids, Life in general, psudo-rant, Random thoughts by g-man || 12 Comments

First I’d like to say thanks for all the kind words of condolence. It has been a very long and very short week. Back to work today. It sucked. I overslept.

While we were away, the bunny pooped everywhere, and ate through the freekin new speaker wire I just put in. (to replace the old speaker wire he ate through). I installed it so that he couldn’t get it, but our bunny sitter moved a planter (probably to catch the little bugger) and exposed the wire.

While we were away, 5YO Booba learned to ride a two wheeler. Yea!

When we got home, we noticed that 8YO Princess Drama Queen’s earring was a bit “off”. Apparently it was just hanging on by a thin bit. She said it doesn’t hurt, and that she hasn’t been tugging on it, or anything like that. My lovely wife suggested that the size of the back was enough to weigh the bugger down, who knows.

Sunday I tried to fix the basement toilet. I bought a new fill valve and installed it. Except it wont work properly in the toilet, since it is a “low rise” tank. I did manage to find out later that I could have fixed the old valve with some $6.00 in parts. Well that was before I accidentally dropped the old nasty valve assembly on my foot (breaking the skin and bruising the top of my foot) and also breaking the top off the old valve. Cost for the new one ($60.00).

I got my iPhone. It is the best thing EVER. I am still a bit pissed since AT&T has not refunded me my money yet, so technically I own two. One I have, and one some criminal has.

One of our friends from swim team and soccer was in Duck, NC and brought back Duck Donuts! I love that woman!

Last night I was lying in bed trying to keep cool, and Booba asked if everyone had these (pointing to my nipples). I said yes every one has nipples. She giggled and said that Daddy has nim-ples. I laughed.

Wanna see ??

Posted on July 29th, 2009 in kids, photography, psudo-rant, WTF, WWC by g-man || 6 Comments

Would you like to see my new iPhone?

I would too.

When it arrived via UPS on Monday, this is what I got.

Apparently the “i” in iPhone stands for “invisible”.

I have been on the phone with UPS and AT&T for the past two days. I’d hope to have some resolution by tomorrow. (And by “resolution” I mean having a freekin’ iPhone in my hands.)

Last night was the swim team awards ceremony/pool party. Both girls won something aside from a trophy, Woo Hoo! It was a a loooong evening.

Afterwards I had a photo shoot with the ever lovely Esmerelda. She liked 5 out of the 80 images, I liked more, but I am way less critical of her appearance. I’d love to shoot her again, but maybe after a shot of tequila so che can relax a bit more, and make it more “fun” than “work”.

Needless to say I have taken a pass on the WWC this week. I had some ideas, but never got around to shooting anything. I’ll be back next week.

Hot Monkey Sex Friday

Posted on July 24th, 2009 in HMS Friday, Hot Monkey Sex, psudo-rant, Random thoughts, WTF by g-man || 2 Comments

Sometimes the porn spam is just insightful, sometimes it just makes you think. I got one today “Subject: Having trouble making love all night long?” To which I replied out loud, “Hell no, I’d much rather be sleeping. It is getting some in the middle of the day when I am awake that is the problem.”

I have received others that ask “Want to act like a porn star?” Again, hello no, they cant act for shit, I want to fuck like a porn star!

“Please her all night long” – Stop snoring?

and one of my personal faves, “increase the size of your load” I mean really, who want to cum buckets, I bet it gets pretty old after a minute or so.

Happy Hot Monkey Sex Friday.

Rain rain …

Posted on June 18th, 2009 in drama, exercise, food, friends, psudo-rant, Random thoughts, travel, weather by g-man || 9 Comments

Why the hell did you follow me to work?

The pink is my route (after I get coffee). I didn’t get the image thing worked out soon enough to be able to show my entire ride to work, and how the colors traveled as I did, but sufficed to say my car was in the “yellow/red” for my entire commute! Which also made people who are already uptight and stupid even more so. Sheesh! I have had enough rain.

SonyHeadphones.jpgYesterday, at the gym, someone moved my headphones from off the counter where I put then during the weight portion of my workout. When I was done lifting and ready to do the cardio I had no earphones from which to jam heavy metal into my head to keep me motivated. I looked about, asked the attendant, pawed the towel basket (not too deeply though, yuck), went to the lost and found, and finally retrieved my backup set from my car. The backup set makes me look like Princess Leia. (If I think of it I’ll take a picture). I was a little perturbed and dismayed at any of the scenarios by which my headphones were relocated. Fortunately they are $10. Sony headphones, so I got a replacement pair from Target. I was intrigued by some $25 ones, but maybe I’ll save that for another day.

Tomorrow is FRIDAY!! And I am going to my other office (closer to home) for the afternoon, which of course precipitates lunch with my lovely wife (if she is not too busy) and or Esmerelda (if she is feeling better) and two of my favorite colleagues from work. Should be a hoot.

Stinky mental health day

Posted on June 4th, 2009 in church, drama, exercise, funny, house, kids, Mental health, psudo-rant, Random thoughts by g-man || 14 Comments

I took Wednesday off because I had a psychiatrist appointment in the morning and a psychologist appointment in the afternoon. It really didn’t make any sense to go to work in between. So I figured that I could get in a work out and have sushi buffet instead. I also figured that since our evening was full of swim team practice, soccer practice, and a church borad meeting that taking the day off was really the best course.

Since I had the day off it seemed a good idea to schedule a doctors appointment for the 5 year old who has been complaining on and off for a while now that her “tummy hurts all the time”. I had planned on taking her myself, but my lovely wife wanted to take her too so we all went. She appears to be okay, but we are giving up milk products for a while to see if there is any change.

The trouble in my day started when I had to take Booba back to school after the doctors. It was going to be her lunch time when we got back, and she had been asking my wife to come and have lunch with her, so since I was going to be there I was asked to stay. I figured I had plenty of time built into my day so why not. It is 11:30 and we get to school at the tail end of her lunch time. She wolfs down half her burger while the boys in her class attack the Happy Meal box. (I smartly left the toy in the car ;) She gave me her fries and 7 minutes after getting there lunch was over. Booba asked me to walk her to recess. I did. She didn’t want me to leave. Poor punkin. After a few minutes and many queries from her classmates and offers to play she let go and I left.

I went home, changed for the gym, took some packages to the UPS Store then hit the gym. I was happy to have my third workout for the week over on a Wednesday, leaving the rest of the weeks evenings open. Woo hoo!.

Well I had completed my circuit and was ten minutes into my 35 minute cardio when I looked at the clock on the wall. I had to be at my second appointent in 45 minutes. SHIT! Well I guess I was going to go stinky. (I have a travel size can of deodorant in the car for just such emergencies) After my workout I hose myself off in the car and prepare my apology speech to the Doc. (He was gracious)

I figured I’d have time between the other things to shower.

After my last appointment I got some Subway for lunch and went home. Halfway through lunch the security system salesman stops by. Heather and I have talked about getting one for a while but have been on the fence so I tell this dude to come back at 6:30. I finish lunch, Ok, now it is time to get the girls off the bus.

After the bus, it is time to get ready for Swim team practice. And we go to practice. Good thing for everyone it is outside and there is a breeze, because my stink spray is wearing off. Heather meets us at the pool and after practice takes Booba back home and I take Princess Drama Queen to her soccer practice, already in progress.

When we get home from soccer practice it is 6:30 and here comes the salesman. I have just got back from standing in the sun for a couple hours after already stewing in my own sauce for some time now. I expect I can attract flies from a mile away. I tell the sales dude that I have a 7:00 meeting at church and he needs to be quick. He is (more or less) and we decide to get a system. He tells us that the installer can be there in a 30 minutes and will only take an hour or so to get up and running. Bonus!

I arrive at church at 7:22, after another generous hosing of deodorant.

Church guy: “Oh hi Scott, I’m glad you are here, I hope that you don’t mind that we really haven’t made any progress.”


Me: “Only if you dont mind that I I havent showers since the gym and stink to high Heaven.”

{more laughter, but they all move away a little}

On my way home after the meeting I am fantasizing that the girls will be in bed and the security system installed, and my wife is ready for action ;) What I came home to was the girls yelling about something, the security guy just getting started, and the only one ready for action was me. :/

We got the girls off to bed, the security guy finished up and it was nearly 10:30 before I finally was able to get into the shower. 10 hours of self basting was enough for this kid, and I’m sure for everyone else I had to interact with.

Today will be better.

Here is a picture I took the other day. Enjoy.


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