Man Overboard!

A place to hang my shit.

Daddy has “nimples”

Posted on August 10th, 2009 in drama, family, funny, kids, Life in general, psudo-rant, Random thoughts by g-man || 12 Comments

First I’d like to say thanks for all the kind words of condolence. It has been a very long and very short week. Back to work today. It sucked. I overslept.

While we were away, the bunny pooped everywhere, and ate through the freekin new speaker wire I just put in. (to replace the old speaker wire he ate through). I installed it so that he couldn’t get it, but our bunny sitter moved a planter (probably to catch the little bugger) and exposed the wire.

While we were away, 5YO Booba learned to ride a two wheeler. Yea!

When we got home, we noticed that 8YO Princess Drama Queen’s earring was a bit “off”. Apparently it was just hanging on by a thin bit. She said it doesn’t hurt, and that she hasn’t been tugging on it, or anything like that. My lovely wife suggested that the size of the back was enough to weigh the bugger down, who knows.

Sunday I tried to fix the basement toilet. I bought a new fill valve and installed it. Except it wont work properly in the toilet, since it is a “low rise” tank. I did manage to find out later that I could have fixed the old valve with some $6.00 in parts. Well that was before I accidentally dropped the old nasty valve assembly on my foot (breaking the skin and bruising the top of my foot) and also breaking the top off the old valve. Cost for the new one ($60.00).

I got my iPhone. It is the best thing EVER. I am still a bit pissed since AT&T has not refunded me my money yet, so technically I own two. One I have, and one some criminal has.

One of our friends from swim team and soccer was in Duck, NC and brought back Duck Donuts! I love that woman!

Last night I was lying in bed trying to keep cool, and Booba asked if everyone had these (pointing to my nipples). I said yes every one has nipples. She giggled and said that Daddy has nim-ples. I laughed.

Hot Monkey Sex Friday

Posted on July 17th, 2009 in funny, HMS Friday, Random thoughts by g-man || 8 Comments

Caption edition.

Okay, so lat time I used the action figures as inspiration, sue me. I thought this was pretty funny and I got nothing else going on so here you go. What funny caption can you put to this.
Picard: “Yeah baby we can make this work, we just need some KY a tricorder and a weed whacker.”

Stinky mental health day

Posted on June 4th, 2009 in church, drama, exercise, funny, house, kids, Mental health, psudo-rant, Random thoughts by g-man || 14 Comments

I took Wednesday off because I had a psychiatrist appointment in the morning and a psychologist appointment in the afternoon. It really didn’t make any sense to go to work in between. So I figured that I could get in a work out and have sushi buffet instead. I also figured that since our evening was full of swim team practice, soccer practice, and a church borad meeting that taking the day off was really the best course.

Since I had the day off it seemed a good idea to schedule a doctors appointment for the 5 year old who has been complaining on and off for a while now that her “tummy hurts all the time”. I had planned on taking her myself, but my lovely wife wanted to take her too so we all went. She appears to be okay, but we are giving up milk products for a while to see if there is any change.

The trouble in my day started when I had to take Booba back to school after the doctors. It was going to be her lunch time when we got back, and she had been asking my wife to come and have lunch with her, so since I was going to be there I was asked to stay. I figured I had plenty of time built into my day so why not. It is 11:30 and we get to school at the tail end of her lunch time. She wolfs down half her burger while the boys in her class attack the Happy Meal box. (I smartly left the toy in the car ;) She gave me her fries and 7 minutes after getting there lunch was over. Booba asked me to walk her to recess. I did. She didn’t want me to leave. Poor punkin. After a few minutes and many queries from her classmates and offers to play she let go and I left.

I went home, changed for the gym, took some packages to the UPS Store then hit the gym. I was happy to have my third workout for the week over on a Wednesday, leaving the rest of the weeks evenings open. Woo hoo!.

Well I had completed my circuit and was ten minutes into my 35 minute cardio when I looked at the clock on the wall. I had to be at my second appointent in 45 minutes. SHIT! Well I guess I was going to go stinky. (I have a travel size can of deodorant in the car for just such emergencies) After my workout I hose myself off in the car and prepare my apology speech to the Doc. (He was gracious)

I figured I’d have time between the other things to shower.

After my last appointment I got some Subway for lunch and went home. Halfway through lunch the security system salesman stops by. Heather and I have talked about getting one for a while but have been on the fence so I tell this dude to come back at 6:30. I finish lunch, Ok, now it is time to get the girls off the bus.

After the bus, it is time to get ready for Swim team practice. And we go to practice. Good thing for everyone it is outside and there is a breeze, because my stink spray is wearing off. Heather meets us at the pool and after practice takes Booba back home and I take Princess Drama Queen to her soccer practice, already in progress.

When we get home from soccer practice it is 6:30 and here comes the salesman. I have just got back from standing in the sun for a couple hours after already stewing in my own sauce for some time now. I expect I can attract flies from a mile away. I tell the sales dude that I have a 7:00 meeting at church and he needs to be quick. He is (more or less) and we decide to get a system. He tells us that the installer can be there in a 30 minutes and will only take an hour or so to get up and running. Bonus!

I arrive at church at 7:22, after another generous hosing of deodorant.

Church guy: “Oh hi Scott, I’m glad you are here, I hope that you don’t mind that we really haven’t made any progress.”


Me: “Only if you dont mind that I I havent showers since the gym and stink to high Heaven.”

{more laughter, but they all move away a little}

On my way home after the meeting I am fantasizing that the girls will be in bed and the security system installed, and my wife is ready for action ;) What I came home to was the girls yelling about something, the security guy just getting started, and the only one ready for action was me. :/

We got the girls off to bed, the security guy finished up and it was nearly 10:30 before I finally was able to get into the shower. 10 hours of self basting was enough for this kid, and I’m sure for everyone else I had to interact with.

Today will be better.

Here is a picture I took the other day. Enjoy.


HMS Friday: Side effects

Posted on May 1st, 2009 in charity, funny, HMS Friday, Hot Monkey Sex, Mental health, Random thoughts, weirdness by g-man || 3 Comments

Welcome back to Hot Monkey Sex Friday. So talking with my psychiatrist about medications was entertaining. As I said in yesterday’s post, he is freekin nuts, but in a good way. He said that he thinks Cymbalta is the right medication for me, but it may have sexual side effects. My regular therapist told me that so I was not surprised when he said that the medication might cause E.D., which he explained as having difficulty in achieving an erection,or taking longer to reach full erection. (So far no problem!)

He also said it may prolong an erection and delay orgasm (Okay, still I sont see where any of this is bad!) I’m sure my lovely wife might appreciate this.

Lastly he said it could increase orgasm duration, to elaborate he said and I quote “Say your normal orgasm lasts for 10 to 15 seconds, well with this you could start and read the F’n Bible by the time you finish.” Holy shit, who needs viagra, gimme some of this and quiet weekend with the Mrs. and I’ll be set for a while. No wonder it is an anti depressant, “Holy shit I can cum for an hour, I AM SUPERMAN!”

I cant wait till next week when I start the 60mg dose!

So do you consider positive or negative side effects?

So I managed to get some pictures from the Rebuilding Together project. (and again this year, there is not one of me. at. all. I am beginning to believe that I may have offended the chick with the camera at some point?

The second picture is my younger son in his element! He was king of the garbage and spent all day in there making sure we could toss all that we needed to.
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What do you call it when,

Posted on April 30th, 2009 in exercise, funny, Mental health, Random thoughts, sanity by g-man || 4 Comments

your psychiatrist is nuttier than you? Yesterday I went for my med consult with Dr. Rick. My regular therapist sent a letter describing my “pathology” so this initial interview should have only taken a half hour to an hour. Well, he didnt have the letter and so it took an hour an a half. I had to apologize to the next guy who had to wait another half hour. To summarize the “feel” of the office the exchange with the next guy went like this:

{leaving Dr’s office} Me to Next guy- “Sorry you had to wait, I guess I am just extra messed up in the head.”

Dr. Rick to Next guy- “But nearly as F’ed up as you!”

Next guy to Dr. Rick- “But that still makes you even more F’ed up then the two of us!”

It is very loose and kinda granola crunchy, but he is really good, and damned funny, and really easy to talk to. That might be because we both act like 12 year olds and dont mind interjecting jokes into the seriousness.

Dr Rick- “Okay, what you need to do is raise issues before they become problems ….”

Me- “Ok. But you better prescribe something because if I go back and tell my wife what I paid you to tell me the same shit she has been telling me for years for free, she will kick my ass!”

Soo I am now taking Cymbalta. Which I may save the side effects conversation for HMS Friday.

So the office staff there is also nutty, when I was setting up my followup appointment she asked me if I wanted an early or late appt. I said I can see how he is always late, I want to be first so I can actually see him. She laughed.

Since my appointment went late I was later to work than I had planned on, so I ended up missing the “fun run”.

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